bombing:

if i had a nickel for every time i heard what you just said to me i wouldn’t have that much money because realistically speaking i don’t hear anything often enough to make a profit

(via pemsylvania)

punkasslouis:

why do people look so shocked when food falls into your cleavage but you eat it anyway like “oh no this grape has been spoiled by my bosom better throw it away” fuck no i’m gonna eat that boobie grape

(via abrandofmyownpoison)

sarcasmsaidit:

these college emails i’ve been getting have started to sound more and more serial killer-ish.

(via abrandofmyownpoison)

I love these new "type these words into your tags box and post the first tag that automatically pops up" thingies, so fun. Let’s do another one:

  • can’t
  • don’t
  • first
  • help
  • please
  • one
  • my
  • will
  • stop
  • get
  • honestly
  • I’m

(via abrandofmyownpoison)

squarlo:

givemeinternet:

5 minutes ago they were chasing the laser

i cant believe you fucking killed your cats with a laser you fucking monster

(via pizza)

romwe:

❤❤❤Get free leggings❤❤❤

1 Follow romwe tumblr

2 Reblog this post( Include picture and the text)

3. Comments on the item

DO NOT REMOVE THE CAPTION/TEXT FROM PHOTO

Free shipping to the worldwide.

Gift:

The winner can get the leggings for free:)

One day one winner!

Ends on 25th April. Only reblog is valid.

Good luck sweeties!!

If you want to buy it, you can click here to buy:

Here is an inner coupon for you, my lovely fans: 10% off leggings  

It’ll help you save another 10% for the leggings on 24th April

 

sexhaver:

boredlord:

What do teens like?!? Is it memes? Memes about skeletons? Piss? Communism?

this post is 20x funnier if you imagine a CEO shouting it at his board of directors

(via iamagentlebritishmanatee)